cock and balls torture vs Pornoduo (2847 views)

ee Sinnu
nl jMz
de Joka
de DaNe
09.12.12 03:45 CET
Awards awarded to for
Lady Macbeth cbt Simply 74 kills
Killing Spree cbt Simply 5 frags without being killed
Accountant cbt Simply 85% kills/killed ratio
He's dead, Jim! /pD/Joka 12 gibs
...and stay dead! /pD/Joka 22% gibs/kill
Lead Poisoning cbt Simply 58 SMG kills
Spammity spam spam! /pD/DaNe 9 SPAM kills
Fragstealer /pD/DaNe 173 damage per frag
Die! Damn you, Die! /pD/Joka 249 damage per frag
What objective? cbt Simply 488 XP
Red Shirt /pD/Joka 95 deaths
Are these pliers sharp? /pD/Joka 9 deaths without fragging
Med Pack Whore cbt jMz 149 damage per death
Eyes Wide Shut cbt jMz 1 team kills
Gingerbread man /pD/DaNe 38 /kills
Player Summary for the entire Match
[-] (click columns to sort, the [+] to expand)
NameEffXPKDGSuiTK/KDGDRTDKnfP/RSMGSPMD/KD/KdKSDS
cbt jMz66292497460123961510850940/04/244/402/1019614747
cbt Simply8548874878012914673115262172/06/358/519/519813258
cbt 7678012316114025224288223763112/010/3102/5111/519714058
/pD/Joka5745454951200261306412243360/10/548/576/724212939
/pD/DaNe6035955921101389312120451760/15/542/449/416913148
/pD/5881310918723016422376242882120/15/590/4415/420613049
Player Summary for supply
[-] 1st Round (click columns to sort, the [+] to expand)
NameEffXPKDGSuiTK/KDGDRTDKnfP/RSMGSPMEvents
cbt jMz82871923300113490282600/01/118/80/3DK/DKKDKDK/DKK//DKK/K/K//KDDDKK/K/KK/DKKDD
cbt Simply1351272720100839212781440/01/021/115/1K/KDDDDK/KKDKDDKDKKK/KKK/KKKKK/DKDKK/KK/DK/KKDK
cbt 10921446434001974115607440/02/139/195/4
/pD/Joka321141031500529653525180/00/18/212/4DDKD/KDDKDDDKK/DDKDDDDDDDDDK/KK/DDDD/DKDD
/pD/DaNe511151427300726423886180/01/111/182/1K//K/KK/DKDK/DKD/KDDDDDDDKKDDDDDDKKD/DKKD
/pD/4222924588001256077411360/01/219/394/5

[-] 2nd Round (click columns to sort, the [+] to expand)
NameEffXPKDGSuiTK/KDGDRTDKnfP/RSMGSPMEvents
cbt jMz7394141900042746317900/03/111/130/2/KDDDKXKDDKDD/DD/KDKKKK/KDKKKDDDDK
cbt Simply4610313281016348334371230/01/111/202/1D/DKDK/DTDDKDDDDKKK/K/KDDDDKK/DDDDDDDK/KKD
cbt 60197274710110622966161230/04/222/332/3
/pD/Joka831322024300942123192180/00/119/131/1DK/KKDKK/DKK/K/KDDKDD/KKDDDDKK/DKK/K/KK/KDDD
/pD/DaNe688317252001324043037180/02/314/91/0/KKK/D/KD/KDK/KD/KD/KKKKDDDDK//KDDK/K//DK/
/pD/7621537495002266166229360/02/433/222/1
Player Summary for sw_goldrush_te
[-] 1st Round (click columns to sort, the [+] to expand)
NameEffXPKDGSuiTK/KDGDRTDKnfP/RSMGSPMEvents
cbt jMz5256917300618431871180/00/08/91/2/KD/KKDDDD///K/KKDDDDKKKDD
cbt Simply1191482521100104842297200/03/120/92/1KKDKDDK/KDKKKK/K//K/KD/K/KD/KKDKK/KK/KDKDKKKDD
cbt 8620434384001666854843180/03/128/183/3
/pD/Joka50103122430052770353700/00/211/161/1D/DK/KDDKKKDKD//D/DDDKDDDDDKDKKDDDKK
/pD/DaNe388110262001120733148180/01/17/122/2DK/KD/DDDDD/KD/K///DKDDK//K/K/DDKDDK
/pD/4418422505001648436685180/01/318/283/3

[-] 2nd Round (click columns to sort, the [+] to expand)
NameEffXPKDGSuiTK/KDGDRTDKnfP/RSMGSPMEvents
cbt jMz4655715001215362974760/00/07/101/3DTDDDKDKDDDDKD/DKKDD/KK
cbt Simply50110918500524272336502/01/16/110/2KXK/DDDDK/KDD//D/DDKDDKDKKKD
cbt 4816516335017396353101262/01/113/211/5
/pD/Joka75105121610073117198900/10/110/72/1K/DK/KK/KDKDK/KK/DX/K/DKKDDDD
/pD/DaNe1008014144017219319741220/11/010/54/1DKKKKDDK/K//K/TK/KKDDK/K/KDDK
/pD/88185263050114531039631220/21/120/126/2

» View plaintext endround stats
Player Chats
cbt Simply [Warmup]: im really really stoned
cbt Simply [Warmup]: :D
/pD/Joka [Countdown]: :D
/pD/Joka [Countdown]: :D
/pD/Joka [Countdown]: hf & gl
cbt Simply [Countdown]: u too bud
cbt Simply [Countdown]: :D
cbt Simply [11:57]: G to the G
cbt Simply [11:16]: :D:D
cbt Simply [11:06]: ={DDDDDDDDDD
cbt Simply [11:06]: ={DDDDDDDDDD
cbt Simply [11:06]: ={DDDDDDDDDD
[11:01]: The Allies have captured the forward bunker!
cbt Simply [10:59]: ={DDDDDDDDDD
[10:49]: The Axis have captured the forward bunker!
[10:26]: The Allies have captured the forward bunker!
[10:14]: The Allies have breached the Forward Bunker Gate!
cbt Simply [9:51]: ={DDDDDDDDDD
cbt Simply [9:51]: ={DDDDDDDDDD
cbt Simply [9:51]: ={DDDDDDDDDD
cbt Simply [9:51]: ={DDDDDDDDDD
[9:48]: The Allies have opened up the Forward spawn rear exit!
cbt Simply [9:47]: OMG :D
cbt Simply [9:22]: ={DDDDDDDDDD
[9:17]: Axis Command Post constructed. Charge speed increased!
cbt Simply [9:09]: ={DDDDDDDDDD
cbt Simply [9:09]: ={DDDDDDDDDD
cbt Simply [9:09]: ={DDDDDDDDDD
cbt Simply [9:08]: ={DDDDDDDDDD
[8:40]: The Allies have breached the Depot Gate!
[8:32]: Allied team has destroyed the Axis Command Post!
cbt Simply [8:28]: guys
[8:27]: Allied Command Post constructed. Charge speed increased!
cbt Simply [8:26]: take it easy :D
cbt Simply [8:25]: omg
cbt Simply [8:15]: ={DDDDDDDDDD
cbt Simply [7:55]: OMGF
cbt Simply [7:52]: dont :D
cbt Simply [7:25]: OMFGG
[7:10]: The Allies have breached the Depot's east wall!
cbt Simply [7:03]: ={DDDDDDDDDD
[6:58]: The Depot Fence has been constructed.
cbt Simply [6:51]: :D
/pD/Joka [6:49]: :D
[6:40]: The Allied Truck is in position!
/pD/Joka [6:05]: :D
cbt Simply [6:03]: ={DDDDDDDDDD
cbt Simply [6:01]: ={DDDDDDDDDD
cbt Simply [5:24]: ={DDDDDDDDDD
cbt Simply [5:24]: ={DDDDDDDDDD
cbt Simply [4:49]: ={DDDDDDDDDD
cbt Simply [4:29]: 3hs .-t
cbt Simply [4:28]: :D
[2:59]: The Crane Controls have been constructed.
cbt Simply [2:58]: ={DDDDDDDDDD
[2:58]: The Allies have activated the crane!
[2:44]: The Allies have loaded the Gold Crate onto the Truck!
/pD/Joka [2:14]: :D
cbt Simply [2:13]: ={DDDDDDDDDD
cbt Simply [2:13]: ={DDDDDDDDDD
cbt Simply [1:14]: ={DDDDDDDDDD
cbt Simply [1:14]: ={DDDDDDDDDD
cbt Simply [1:13]: ={DDDDDDDDDD
cbt Simply [0:42]: ={DDDDDDDDDD
cbt jMz [0:37]: gg
cbt Simply [0:34]: wp :D
cbt Simply [0:33]: lol
cbt Simply [0:22]: :D
cbt jMz [0:22]: xD
cbt Simply [0:20]: ={DDDDDDDDDD
cbt Simply [0:19]: ={DDDDDDDDDD
cbt Simply [0:13]: ={DDDDDDDDDD
cbt Simply [0:03]: ={DDDDDDDDDD
[Intermission]: >>> Clock set to: 12:00
cbt Simply [Intermission]: almost :D
cbt Simply [Intermission]: t:D
cbt Simply [Warmup]: OMG
/pD/DaNe [Warmup]: ReaDy.
cbt Simply [Warmup]: im pwning
cbt Simply [Warmup]: wtf
cbt Simply [Countdown]: .:D:D:D
cbt jMz [Countdown]: no
cbt Simply [11:32]: OMG
cbt Simply [11:05]: ={DDDDDDDDDD
cbt Simply [11:00]: ={DDDDDDDDDD
cbt Simply [10:12]: ={DDDDDDDDDD
cbt Simply [10:06]: ={DDDDDDDDDD
cbt Simply [9:55]: ={DDDDDDDDDD
cbt Simply [9:54]: ={DDDDDDDDDD
cbt Simply [9:54]: ={DDDDDDDDDD
cbt Simply [9:54]: ={DDDDDDDDDD
cbt Simply [9:54]: ={DDDDDDDDDD
cbt Simply [9:50]: ={DDDDDDDDDD
cbt Simply [9:48]: OIMFG
cbt Simply [9:47]: :D:DD
cbt Simply [9:34]: :D:D
cbt Simply [9:33]: cmin
cbt Simply [9:02]: ={DDDDDDDDDD
cbt jMz [9:00]: :{D
cbt jMz [9:00]: :{D
cbt Simply [8:50]: ONMG :
cbt Simply [8:47]: ={DDDDDDDDDD
cbt Simply [8:41]: ={DDDDDDDDDD
cbt Simply [8:34]: dude :D
cbt Simply [8:32]: your so good
/pD/Joka [8:32]: :D
/pD/Joka [8:32]: :D
cbt Simply [8:31]: wtf :D
cbt Simply [8:28]: stop pwning me :D
cbt Simply [8:11]: omg :D
[7:10]: The Allies have captured the forward bunker!
[7:07]: The Axis have captured the forward bunker!
[7:06]: The Allies have captured the forward bunker!
cbt Simply [7:00]: ={DDDDDDDDDD
[6:53]: The Depot Fence has been constructed.
[6:47]: Axis Command Post constructed. Charge speed increased!
[6:10]: The Allies have opened up the Forward spawn rear exit!
[6:05]: The Axis have captured the forward bunker!
[6:04]: The Allies have captured the forward bunker!
[6:00]: The Allies have breached the Forward Bunker Gate!
cbt Simply [5:25]: ={DDDDDDDDDD
cbt Simply [5:25]: ={DDDDDDDDDD
cbt Simply [5:23]: ={DDDDDDDDDD
cbt Simply [5:23]: ={DDDDDDDDDD
cbt Simply [5:20]: ={DDDDDDDDDD
cbt Simply [4:53]: OIMGF
[4:03]: Allied team has destroyed the Axis Command Post!
[3:52]: Allied Command Post constructed. Charge speed increased!
cbt Simply [3:31]: ={DDDDDDDDDD
cbt Simply [3:31]: ={DDDDDDDDDD
cbt Simply [3:13]: unfair :D
cbt Simply [2:43]: IMNG :D
cbt Simply [2:36]: u tricked me :D
/pD/Joka [2:34]: :D
cbt Simply [2:10]: OMG :D
cbt Simply [1:48]: LOL
cbt Simply [1:45]: wp
cbt Simply [1:44]: ={DDDDDDDDDD
cbt Simply [0:53]: ={DDDDDDDDDD
cbt Simply [0:53]: ={DDDDDDDDDD
cbt Simply [0:45]: ={DDDDDDDDDD
/pD/Joka [0:43]: gg
/pD/Joka [0:25]: :D
cbt Simply [0:24]: OMG
cbt Simply [0:23]: unfair :D
/pD/Joka [0:22]: luck
/pD/Joka [0:21]: incoming
/pD/Joka [0:20]: :D
cbt Simply [0:20]: you knew :D
[Intermission]: >>> Objective NOT reached in time (12:00)
cbt Simply [Intermission]: :D
cbt Simply [Intermission]: im so shit :D
cbt Simply [11:19]: ={DDDDDDDDDD
cbt Simply [11:18]: ={DDDDDDDDDD
[10:57]: The Tank has been repaired!
[10:54]: Allied team has stolen the Tank!
cbt Simply [10:28]: ={DDDDDDDDDD
[10:19]: Axis Command Post constructed. Charge speed increased!
[8:52]: The Tank has been damaged!
cbt Simply [8:52]: ={DDDDDDDDDD
[8:21]: The Tank has been repaired!
[8:08]: Truck Barrier #1 has been constructed.
[8:05]: Allied team has destroyed the Bank Doors!
[7:43]: Allied team has destroyed the Axis Command Post!
[7:40]: Allied Command Post constructed. Charge speed increased!
[5:57]: Truck Barrier #1 has been destroyed.
cbt Simply [5:05]: OMFG :D
cbt Simply [4:45]: OMG
cbt Simply [4:44]: so LOW
cbt Simply [4:41]: :D:D
[4:35]: Axis have returned the objective!
cbt Simply [4:01]: ={DDDDDDDDDD
cbt jMz [3:17]: unhit hit
[3:01]: Allied team is escaping with the Gold Crate!
cbt jMz [2:40]: why so much rape
cbt Simply [2:38]: :D
cbt Simply [2:34]: :D:DD
cbt Simply [1:09]: wp :D
[1:03]: Allied team escaped with the Gold Crate!
[Intermission]: >>> Clock set to: 10:56
/pD/Joka [Intermission]: gg
/pD/Joka [Intermission]: simply hacks on
/pD/Joka [Intermission]: :D
cbt Simply [Intermission]: :D:DD
cbt Simply [Intermission]: so stoned :D
cbt Simply [Intermission]: smaller map
cbt Simply [Intermission]: eassier :D
/pD/DaNe [Warmup]: ReaDy.
[10:06]: The Tank has been repaired!
[10:03]: Allied team has stolen the Tank!
[9:42]: Tank Barrier #1 has been constructed.
cbt Simply [8:18]: ={DDDDDDDDDD
cbt Simply [8:18]: ={DDDDDDDDDD
[7:43]: Tank Barrier #1 has been destroyed.
[7:22]: Axis Command Post constructed. Charge speed increased!
cbt jMz [7:12]: gonna delete et after
[6:12]: Allied team has destroyed the Axis Command Post!
[5:59]: The Tank has been damaged!
[5:58]: Allied Command Post constructed. Charge speed increased!
[5:07]: The Tank has been repaired!
cbt Simply [5:01]: ={DDDDDDDDDD
[4:56]: Allied team has destroyed the Bank Doors!
[3:51]: Allied team is escaping with the Gold Crate!
cbt Simply [3:48]: 3rd too?
cbt Simply [3:46]: for the lulz :D
cbt jMz [3:44]: xd
cbt Simply [3:44]: i wanna play :D
/pD/Joka [3:42]: tired :D
cbt Simply [3:38]: NOOO :D
cbt Simply [3:38]: pls
/pD/Joka [3:37]: after this wanna sleep
/pD/Joka [3:37]: :D
cbt Simply [3:35]: plsplsplspls
cbt Simply [3:34]: plsplsplspslsp
cbt Simply [3:25]: PLS :D
cbt Simply [3:23]: :D:D:
cbt Simply [2:45]: OMG
cbt Simply [2:42]: ={DDDDDDDDDD
cbt Simply [2:28]: LOW
cbt Simply [2:23]: oops teamchat :D
/pD/Joka [2:20]: :D
/pD/Joka [1:48]: :D
cbt Simply [1:47]: ={DDDDDDDDDD
cbt Simply [1:47]: ={DDDDDDDDDD
cbt Simply [1:47]: ={DDDDDDDDDD
cbt Simply [1:47]: ={DDDDDDDDDD
cbt Simply [1:47]: ={DDDDDDDDDD
cbt Simply [1:46]: ={DDDDDDDDDD
cbt Simply [1:44]: LOL
cbt Simply [1:40]: :D:D::D:D
cbt Simply [1:36]: LOL
cbt Simply [1:20]: :D:D
[1:12]: Allied team escaped with the Gold Crate!
[Intermission]: >>> Objective reached at 9:44 (original: 10:56)
/pD/Joka [Intermission]: gg wp
cbt Simply [Intermission]: 3rd
cbt Simply [Intermission]: plsplspls
cbt Simply [Intermission]: plsplspls :D
cbt jMz [Intermission]: SO TIRED:d
/pD/Joka [Intermission]: no sry.. really
/pD/Joka [Intermission]: :D
cbt Simply [Intermission]: NOOOOO :D
cbt Simply [Intermission]: plsplsplspls :D
cbt jMz [Warmup]: gg:D

These stats are experimental and while we usually get very accurate numbers we can't guarantee they are 100% spot on. You can however view the endroundstats: Those are the endroundstats 1:1 how they were spammed on the server console, they are guaranteed to be correct (unless they're off, which sometimes happens too :p).
Some examples that will definitely break stats:

  • Server crash / restart
  • Players reconnecting with new ids
  • Too many random renames between rounds

Credits to the author of StatWhore of which we borrowed the awards and the general layout of the stats.
Thanks to Hannes who made the software that extracts all the stats from tv demos available to us.